Imagine that you’ve had a terrible morning. You woke up late, traffic was a beast, and when you walked into work, you were reprimanded for a late project. You just got a notification from your bank that a check bounced and now you have a fee for 50$ on top of everything else that you’re struggling to pay. When you drop your homemade lunch all over the floor… how do you react?
This is about the time when most of us show what our stress response is. It’s also about the time that people who are recovering from addiction start to crave their substance of choice. However, learning coping techniques to deal with stress in immediate and practical ways can strengthen our resilience against relapse and lead us to live more balanced, peaceful lives. So even if you’re not usually a fan of meditation, try this technique to turn a moment of turmoil into a moment of serenity.
Step One: Breathe
The oldest and most effective meditation practices always start with the breath. In fact, even to those who are completely unfamiliar with meditation, taking one or two deep breaths is the default, universal way to calm down in a moment. You’ve probably tried it once or twice yourself. However, instead of taking a deep breath and then moving on, take another breath. Take a few more moments. Concentrate on your breath going in and out. Take a moment to be grateful for this most basic of human needs. We can go days without water, and weeks without food. All other needs in your life are even less immediate, in truth. But you can’t go more than a minute without air. Focus on that, and the fact that you have all around you the exact thing that you need.
In order to help bring your focus in, it can help to count. Try counting to three as you breathe in, hold the breath for two seconds, and then breathe out for four seconds. To establish a pattern, breathe in for four counts, and then out for four counts. Count as fast or slow as you like, just make sure that you draw the focus to your breath.
Step Two: Observe
If you want to take your meditation to the next level, try mindfulness observation. Pick something close in the natural world to observe. This could be clouds in the sky, water flowing or dripping, leaves in the wind, or even a blade of grass. If you’re somewhere indoors, consider getting a potted plant or a fountain for just this purpose. Sink into observation of the subject to the point that you forget yourself. Track the movements of the object, trace the contours that make up the veins of the leaf, or find patterns where you can. Observe without any kind of judgement or initiative to act on what you see. Nature draws us out of ourselves and disrupts the patterns of negative thinking where we usually find ourselves stuck. Couple this observation with your breathing so that your mind is completely occupied by these two things.
Step Three: Recite a Mantra
One technique in calming meditation that many people find effective is to find a mantra and use it to direct your focus. This mantra could be anything from a name (think of someone that helps you find purpose and meaning in your life, or sometimes it can be the name of deity) to a word (like “peace” or “serenity”) that helps you remember your goals. It could be a phrase that means something powerful to you. Often, using a mantra for meditation will help you to find more powerful and profound meaning in that mantra because when you focus on it continually you start looking deeper and apply it to many varied situations throughout your day. You can couple this with either breathing or observation in order to channel your thoughts as a beginner in meditation.